Monday, May 14, 2007

this is why blogs are a bad idea

This is a bleak bleak BLEAK summer.

With Seth and Justin's powers combined, I'm almost convinced to start going to singles ward. I'm not certain a miracle will happen and friends will appear, but I have to at least try. My freaking comfort zone will have to be breached. I should be feeling optimistic instead of hopeless. Today people called me who I was really excited to talk to--all my freshman year boys are getting off their missions. Today I didn't feel sorry for myself, and instead I was happy. I should try to make that a habit again.

But it's REALLY hard sometimes. I don't have any friends here, I hate being alone, I hate waking up early, I hate working full time, I hate my job, I hate getting dumped, I hate knowing that I'm here for 3 more months, I miss Provo and all my friends. I'm such a freaking hater, and such a baby. But not a baby-hater--that's good right?

I was feeling sad that all my cool new personal progression didn't get a chance to be tested and proven--just now realized that this IS the test and so far I'm sucking at it.

This is so awkward and pathetic. Ok I'm done. Back to my sad music that somehow makes me feel better. I'm so lame.

1 comment:

TheMoncurs said...

Just for the record, I went to the singles ward only after being bribed by a friend of mine who went for only one or two weeks before going off on vacations for the rest of the summer. 1 month later a very attractive young man named Aaron Moncur sat next to me in sacrament meeting while I was sitting there alone one Sunday. The rest is history. So..who knows?