geeky introversion

Like most teenagers, I spent a good amount of my youth trying to be cool, which takes energy and doesn't usually work. And by "youth" I mean right up til, like, now.  I am FINALLY at an age where I can stop trying to be cool and just be cool to myself.  Does that make sense?  Given my newfound freedom, I am becoming WAY cooler (in my own eyes) than I ever was.  And I get to do stuff I always wanted to but was worried how it would look.  For instance: dyeing my hair purple.  Putting purple streaks in my hair brings me no end of happiness.  I know it might look weird, but it makes me smile when I brush my hair in the morning.    I paint my nails whatever color I want--lately, black.  Instead of loving geeky stuff but not broadcasting it, I wear it loud and proud.  So what if people unfollow me on Pinterest because they get sick of my Doctor Who pictures?  I can't help it if every picture of David Tennant is so adorable that I just have to share it.  I have my many, many X-Files books out in my living room, instead of semi-hidden on my bedroom bookshelf.  I'm okay with the fact that every show I watch is something I have to obsess over. I've been coveting a pair of black combat boots hardcore--not that those are nerdy, but they're definitely not something Teen Becca would have had the confidence to wear.  I'm FINALLY getting to do whatever I want and it's sooooo fun.  The main idea behind geekiness is enthusiasm and passion and freaking out about something because you love it so much.  What isn't cool about that?  Simon Pegg, who is freakishly awesome, explained it like this: "Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection.  It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something.  It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult.  Being a geek is extremely liberating."  Unfortunately,  I'm also a geek-snob, which is problematic because I think I'm better than other geeks.  I liked most of this stuff WAAAAY before the little high school nerds stumbled onto it and felt the need to pin it.

And now it's time to reveal a geeky thing about myself, previously only confessed to Kyle and possibly Katy: my dream is to go to San Diego Comic-Con.  Dress up, go to panels, meet my heroes, the whole deal.

ANYWAYS--I'm not trying to proclaim my geek credentials. I know that I'm geeky, and I know that it's cool.  It's fun and I'm happy and that's it.  

And now I have to go--this season of Buffy isn't going to watch itself.